Shit has gone dark.


No my sister isn’t banging a black guy (that I know of)

And no, I am not shitting out shoe polish. (Although that’d be fucking hilarious)

The power is out at my house! Is there anything worse than receiving a phone call from your wife, who is home before you, and she immediately yells “we have a problem!!!” ?

I shit my pants, shoe polish. But then she went on to tell me our power was out, UGH!

So the entire grid of the city I live on has no power. Businesses, houses, apartments…….DARK.

Scary shit, it is like “I am legend” or some shit. People running out of their houses with pillows, bags, perishable items…..as if a blimp of AIDS just hit a power cord in front of a gigantic 300 foot industrial fan, spreading that shit around town like dandelions!

So naturally…..we grabbed everything we own, hopped in the car, and drove 25 minutes south to my parents house in good ole’ Gastonia nc! Thank god they have a big house. We will be sleeping on the couch, waking up at 5am, and driving all the way to work….with enevitable shit amounts of sleep.

It should be back on tomorrow. (the power)

Let’s hope! It’s been hotter than South Florida this week in Charlotte NC, last thing I need is a fucking 100 degree house, with rotting milk in my fridge.

Oh and Duke energy…………..you owe me butter, milk, multiple frozen dinners (hungry man bitch!!!), ice, and a carton of cookie dough ice cream…..

I except to be compensated ASAP.


~ by Failhorn on June 2, 2011.

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