Hangover

Exactly how I look right now

Hangover horrible horrible hangover. Talk about a incredible low after a incredible high, amiright?!!? You party all night, get wasted, troll some pervs on chatroulette and all of a sudden you are waking up feeling like 3 gorillas are pounding Neil Pert’s drum kit inside of your head for a 7 AM wake up call.

What make’s it worse? Oh I don’t know, how about a 3 year old with the intensity of a coked out wino in a bum fight jumping on your head yelling about the Thor toy’s my brother got for him from Burger King the day before! This thing called”parenting” is a deadly combination when mixed with hangover’s.

The 3 year old was fast asleep dreaming about peeing his pants and marshmallows while you were pounding beer’s and taking shots. He goes about his business like any ordinary weekend morning. You however, are dragging yourself out of bed like G.I. Joe crawling under barbed wire, looking for the closest toilet to dispose of the entire bag of Dorito’s you ate at 4 AM.

So as I sit here, watching “Shrek” for the 30th time in the past 2 weeks, I urge you single people out there, or people without kid’s, take advantage of it! Get wasted, have fun, go party, go out on the town, go to waffle house at 3 AM and order the biggest plate imaginable! Because once you become daddy, YOUR playtime is OVER.

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~ by Failhorn on May 21, 2011.

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